AAS Literary Challenge

[emwcee]

I have loved the poetry thread. For the All Alaska Sweepstakes, I was struck by the unique names of the checkpoints, and I thought I'd try something new: A unique literary challenge. See how many of the checkpoints you can use in a story or poem. Here's my attempt:

"Timber!"

The old man grimaced as he watched another tree fall. A squirrel scurried out of the way, seeking safety in the underbrush. These pines had stood since the gold run. The forest was a haven for wildlife.

But the city council had voted to allow logging, and the first chance they had, lumbermen had attacked the oldest, tallest trees.

What should he do? The old timer's isolated cabin had no electricity, no telephone. But the man had the wisdom of Solomon and the sweetness of a Boston cream pie. He vowed to light a candle in the darkness, and strode towards the ancient forest. Like the soldiers at the Battle of Hastings, he would stand firm.

[CynCyn37]

Cool Ems!

[tanglefoot]

beautiful, sounds like the start to a frozen chosen story

[MelanieGouldFanBrian]

I have way too much time on my hands today evidently!

"The FIRST CHANCE I get" Bob bellowed as he bellied up to the bar, "I'm gonna squeeze Kevin HASTINGS scrawny little neck."
"Why?" questioned a fellow named Arnie who sat beside him. "What did Kev do to you?"
"NOME?" Bob bellowed again.
"I'll say I know him. That no good son of a gun stole all of my BOSTON albums years ago, and I haven't seen them or him since."
"Well," Burped Bob, "I spent 14 hours the other day cutting wood for winter. I only stopped once to answer the TELEPHONE. When I came back, all my TIMBER was gone. All I heard and saw was Hastings laughing and the taillights on his dogsled as he sped away."
"Did you call the authorities?" Questioned Arnie.
"I went to the City COUNCIL today and registered a formal complaint." Bob barked, "But they said that Hastings had probably reached a safe HAVEN somewhere by now and that I'd never find him."
"Yeah," Arnie agreed, "It would take the wisdom of SOLOMON to track that no good varmint down,"
"Hey, I've got an idea," Bob beamed. Let's get in your car and follow the GOLD RUN trail down to FORT DAVIS. I think he's hiding in SAFETY in one of them old abandon mines up there."
"OK," agreed Arnie. So they went out to his Ford Pinto, "Let's light this CANDLE," Bob begged. But they found Arnie's anti-freeze leaking out all over the parking lot.
"Dag Nabbit," Arnie swore, "Looks like that no good Hastings has been here and stole the stopcock on my radiator."
"The bottom one?" Belched Bob.
"No," Answered arnie heading back into the bar. "Looks like he stole the TOPKOK."

Oh that's a moaner there.

Brian

[MelanieGouldFanBrian]

I can only surmise that I'm pronouncing that last checkpoint name correctly!

Brian

[sugarriver]

(I'm REALLY really sorry about this, but I wanta' play, too>)


It was a dark and stormy night. The telephone rang, interrupting my candlelit dinner at the comfortable little roadhouse I had recently discovered. It sat nestled in the timber just a little southeast of Nome.

I thought I had found a perfect haven far removed from the hustle and bustle of the Boston council-chambers, where the air was sometimes as thick as Hastings Puddy. (I had
so-o-o tired of my role as Solomon, bestowed upon me as the big rooster, the topkok, the council’s senior attorney. I was feeling smothered by the bantering, squabbling top-hens of city politics, who couldn’t tell their Fort Davis from their Union Oyster House! Let them sort it out by themselves! I’m outa’ there!) At the first chance, I ran for safety, taking only my cell phone, my Iditabuddy list and my old Olivetti. I hoped to begin a new, uncomplicated life as a writer of epic poems and posts in the land of gold (“runs in the family” as my father, Johnny Horton, used to say.)

The voice at the other end of the line said “Horton? Is that you? Horton? Here’s a . . . Who? No, it's Breaker! Just listen! Here's a problem I need your help with. I think I'm going to have to rewrite my will: I've got relatives coming out of the woodwork! This fame stuff ain't all it's cracked up to be! Can you meet me back in Anchorage on Tuesday? Puh-leze?!?"

Oh, well - maybe I can make an epic poem out of his story - if I can unravel it! Anybody know a good musher who can get me to the airport?

[tanglefoot]

MGFB
fantastic i had to luahg out loud at the punch line..priceless!!! hahahahahaha topkok hahahahhahahaha pure sled dog comical genius!

[Moose]

You guys are awesome. So funny. Thanks for the grins , the chuckles , and the outright belly laughs !

[emwcee]

Great job, both of you! I think you got all the checkpoints in. More than I did, anyway. Anyone else want to try?

[MelanieGouldFanBrian]

T' was truly an inspired and border-line insane idea you had there Em.
I really enjoyed conjuring mine up! (and not one Melanie Gould reference either)

Let's get some more creative juices flowing out there.

Brian